Quandry

polo_pro · 03-01-2008, 03:16 AM

For weeks now, I've sat...thought....remembered. Alot's happened...decisions were made....strong words were spoken. I can see both sides of this argument, so honestly, I don't know what to do.

What should a person do when my fellow gliders argue?

ps - The purpose of this thread is for people to give me more advice (and hopefully options) than what appeared in the poll. Try to be constructive people...if this gets out of hand, you'll just end up causing this thread to be deleted.

polo_pro · 03-01-2008, 03:32 AM

I forgot the most obvious option in that poll!

"The poster should just forget about it all and go play some polo!" 8^) 8^) 8^)

BillK · 03-01-2008, 08:24 AM

For me - there were several things that have helped me "cope" with others "stupidity" (what we feel it is when someone else disagrees with us

)

1. realization of personality types
2. reaization of what matters

If you study personality types you figure out that people react differently than YOU would in the same situation. Once I got that figured out it was no longer necessary for me to try to get them to react the same way - One of my now favorite sayings is that if everyone liked the same things everyone would be after my wife!

The second thing was pretty major for me - I was brought up in a conservative religion where everything was a matter of what God wanted and it was hell or heaven with almost all decisions. I have since gone through some pretty eye opening knowledge enhancements

and no longer believe in all that "stuff" so what you believe and how you act (for me anyway) is no longer the same life and death struggle to make you believe what I believe.

I guess that when you can let other people be who they want to be it is a good thing.

Now - when someone is being "no fun to be around" and they are where I want to be I have a couple of choices -
1. try to get them to stop being a jerk/problem
2. leave myself

Depending on how bad I want/need to be where I am helps me to prioritize which of those two options I work on the hardest.

Not sure if any of that makes sense to you or helps in any way - but there it is...
Thanks for listening,
Bill

quade · 03-01-2008, 10:09 AM

Well, you may have been quiet on the subject for the last month or so, but it seems as if you're making up for lost time now.

Except for a very few and tenacious individuals, this topic died a while back. People do what they do and it's their issue not mine.

Anyway . . . holding grudges is bad for the soul. It turns people from being nice people that occasionally disagree into jerks with only one mission in life; to "get even." Ya can't, "get even." Ya can't unring a bell. What is said is said and what is done is done. Sometimes, ya just have to let it go.

nora k · 03-01-2008, 10:18 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by polo_pro

For weeks now, I've sat...thought....remembered. Alot's happened...decisions were made....strong words were spoken. I can see both sides of this argument, so honestly, I don't know what to do.

What should a person do when my fellow gliders argue?

ps - The purpose of this thread is for people to give me more advice (and hopefully options) than what appeared in the poll. Try to be constructive people...if this gets out of hand, you'll just end up causing this thread to be deleted.

was there an option to sit in the fetal position in the corner holding your hands over your ears while mumbling "jesus saves"?

you publicly stated your reason for going silent last month b/c you wanted to remember gliders past. that is noble and be recognized by everyone. it was done with pure intention and the thought of others before yourself.

your ethos is polo. posters disagree all the time, but it shouldn't stop you from writing about your love for polo. and as you said the board has been way less snippy lately.

RAG1247 · 03-01-2008, 11:46 AM

polo

you ask

What should a person do when my fellow gliders argue?

with all due respect, I am not sure of what you are asking. Are you asking what to do if you are part of the argument or as a bystander?

you can interject your thoughts into the argument which may or may not help. If the argument is straighforward such as someone stating 2 and 2 is 4 and another poster thinks the total is three, it's somewhat easier. However most of the arguments involve personal opinions and the problem becomes more of a crisis when one person tries to force their opinion on others and then gets personal.

I may think a poster is off the wall with their opinion but the minute I post such an opinion the situation gets worse. So I would never post such a comment.

If you are truly interested in seg polo and I am not, there is nothing wrong with that. Both sides are neither right or wrong.

In the grand scheme of life, most of the bickering or arguing on segway chat means very, very, little. There is far more to life than segways.

Relax and enjoy the posts you enjoy and ignore the ones you don't.

polo_pro · 03-01-2008, 12:06 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by RAG1247

polo

you ask

What should a person do when my fellow gliders argue?

with all due respect, I am not sure of what you are asking. Are you asking what to do if you are part of the argument or as a bystander?

I meant this thread to be a companion to of the http://forums.segwaychat.com/showthread.php?t=17986 thread. This thread is where I wanted people to "discuss" the options in the other thread.

If you look at some of the options, it'll make more sense. I don't really have clarification for you, but as you'll see when you refer to the other thread, I'm referring to any argument that gets enough out of hand so that it involves a moderator. You may be a participant....you might not be and only have a vested interested.

RAG1247 · 03-01-2008, 12:23 PM

the poll question asked:

When a poster disagrees with moderators regarding a topic,what should that member do?

in this thread you asked:

What should a person do when my fellow gliders argue?

I guess I looked at it that they were not the same question.

Unfortunately, or maybe fortunately, this chat is not a democracy. You can provide your comments to the moderators, but must live with whatever decision he, she, or they come to, if you wish to stay in the game.

Everyone is entitled to their opinion, which for the most part should be respected even though one might think someone should be institutionalized.

KSagal · 03-01-2008, 12:44 PM

I feel there are surely avenues that a person can take that are not in that poll.

First off, the poll seems to take the position that when you disagree with a moderator, that is it. Discussion closed...

I feel that the moderators are just people with a job. I get along with all of them, but to differing degrees. I may not agree with the actions of one, but they are not a single brain with four bodies...

They treat each other with respect, as we all should. But that does not mean that you cannot respectfully disagree with a decision. IF you do, and express that well, with sufficient documentation, then your argument does not fit any of the choices that I saw in the poll.

You may or may not convince them to reverse a decision, but if you are successful in your argument, then possibly, the next time the issue comes up, it will have had the benifit of the previous discussion, and may possibly come to a different end...

So, the moderators are clearly not thinking democratically on this forum, but that does not mean they are not thinking. Appeal to their sense of right and wrong, and see what influence you may have...

I do not condone pushing the issue too hard, because as I said, they are just people, and no one likes to to be forced into a corner.

Of course, I do not always exibit the ability to follow my own advise. It is sound advise, but not easy to master...

polo_pro · 03-01-2008, 01:16 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by KSagal

I feel there are surely avenues that a person can take that are not in that poll.

Just so people know, other SC readers have mentioned this to me. I was limited to only 10 options. I even dropped off the "Oh, just drop the matter and go play some polo" option!

It really hurt to pass up a chance to OPTA like that! 8^) 8^) 8^)

ps - Other folks have made similar comments as Karl. I thought the fifth option of "The poster should discuss what's acceptable with the moderator, and then rephrase things" covers the idea of working out any issues with the moderators in a civil manner (either before or after the act of posting).

Karl is correct that I didn't really include options where as an uninvolved third party you agree with the moderators. For those cases, there's really no issue with how a SC reader proceed forward. It's pretty much a matter of sending the moderators a "good job" PM and maybe posting something publicly showing your support of their decision. That's pretty much a "business as usual" scenario.

03-01-2008, 03:16 AM	#1
polo_pro Advanced Member Join Date: Aug 2005 Location: Sacramento, CA, USA. Posts: 2,608	Quandry For weeks now, I've sat...thought....remembered. Alot's happened...decisions were made....strong words were spoken. I can see both sides of this argument, so honestly, I don't know what to do. What should a person do when my fellow gliders argue? ps - The purpose of this thread is for people to give me more advice (and hopefully options) than what appeared in the poll. Try to be constructive people...if this gets out of hand, you'll just end up causing this thread to be deleted.

03-01-2008, 03:32 AM	#2
polo_pro Advanced Member Join Date: Aug 2005 Location: Sacramento, CA, USA. Posts: 2,608	forgot one option I forgot the most obvious option in that poll! "The poster should just forget about it all and go play some polo!" 8^) 8^) 8^)

03-01-2008, 10:09 AM	#4
quade Senior Member Join Date: Jun 2007 Location: Santa Ana, CA Posts: 1,335	Well, you may have been quiet on the subject for the last month or so, but it seems as if you're making up for lost time now. Except for a very few and tenacious individuals, this topic died a while back. People do what they do and it's their issue not mine. Anyway . . . holding grudges is bad for the soul. It turns people from being nice people that occasionally disagree into jerks with only one mission in life; to "get even." Ya can't, "get even." Ya can't unring a bell. What is said is said and what is done is done. Sometimes, ya just have to let it go. __________________ Harry Potter may fly a broomstick, but I ride a magic lawnmower.

03-01-2008, 11:46 AM	#6
RAG1247 Member Join Date: Nov 2002 Location: Ft. Lauderdale, Florida, USA. Posts: 1,087	polo you ask What should a person do when my fellow gliders argue? with all due respect, I am not sure of what you are asking. Are you asking what to do if you are part of the argument or as a bystander? you can interject your thoughts into the argument which may or may not help. If the argument is straighforward such as someone stating 2 and 2 is 4 and another poster thinks the total is three, it's somewhat easier. However most of the arguments involve personal opinions and the problem becomes more of a crisis when one person tries to force their opinion on others and then gets personal. I may think a poster is off the wall with their opinion but the minute I post such an opinion the situation gets worse. So I would never post such a comment. If you are truly interested in seg polo and I am not, there is nothing wrong with that. Both sides are neither right or wrong. In the grand scheme of life, most of the bickering or arguing on segway chat means very, very, little. There is far more to life than segways. Relax and enjoy the posts you enjoy and ignore the ones you don't. __________________ Richard Ft. Lauderdale *"If you can’t change the people around you, change the people around you"*

03-01-2008, 12:23 PM	#8
RAG1247 Member Join Date: Nov 2002 Location: Ft. Lauderdale, Florida, USA. Posts: 1,087	the poll question asked: When a poster disagrees with moderators regarding a topic,what should that member do? in this thread you asked: What should a person do when my fellow gliders argue? I guess I looked at it that they were not the same question. Unfortunately, or maybe fortunately, this chat is not a democracy. You can provide your comments to the moderators, but must live with whatever decision he, she, or they come to, if you wish to stay in the game. Everyone is entitled to their opinion, which for the most part should be respected even though one might think someone should be institutionalized. __________________ Richard Ft. Lauderdale *"If you can’t change the people around you, change the people around you"*

03-01-2008, 08:24 AM	#3
BillK Member Join Date: Jun 2007 Location: Central Texas Posts: 275	For me - there were several things that have helped me "cope" with others "stupidity" (what we feel it is when someone else disagrees with us ) 1. realization of personality types 2. reaization of what matters If you study personality types you figure out that people react differently than YOU would in the same situation. Once I got that figured out it was no longer necessary for me to try to get them to react the same way - One of my now favorite sayings is that if everyone liked the same things everyone would be after my wife! The second thing was pretty major for me - I was brought up in a conservative religion where everything was a matter of what God wanted and it was hell or heaven with almost all decisions. I have since gone through some pretty eye opening knowledge enhancements and no longer believe in all that "stuff" so what you believe and how you act (for me anyway) is no longer the same life and death struggle to make you believe what I believe. I guess that when you can let other people be who they want to be it is a good thing. Now - when someone is being "no fun to be around" and they are where I want to be I have a couple of choices - 1. try to get them to stop being a jerk/problem 2. leave myself Depending on how bad I want/need to be where I am helps me to prioritize which of those two options I work on the hardest. Not sure if any of that makes sense to you or helps in any way - but there it is... Thanks for listening, Bill

03-01-2008, 12:44 PM	#9
KSagal Glides a lot, talks more... Join Date: Jan 2004 Location: Pelham, NH, USA. Posts: 10,356	I feel there are surely avenues that a person can take that are not in that poll. First off, the poll seems to take the position that when you disagree with a moderator, that is it. Discussion closed... I feel that the moderators are just people with a job. I get along with all of them, but to differing degrees. I may not agree with the actions of one, but they are not a single brain with four bodies... They treat each other with respect, as we all should. But that does not mean that you cannot respectfully disagree with a decision. IF you do, and express that well, with sufficient documentation, then your argument does not fit any of the choices that I saw in the poll. You may or may not convince them to reverse a decision, but if you are successful in your argument, then possibly, the next time the issue comes up, it will have had the benifit of the previous discussion, and may possibly come to a different end... So, the moderators are clearly not thinking democratically on this forum, but that does not mean they are not thinking. Appeal to their sense of right and wrong, and see what influence you may have... I do not condone pushing the issue too hard, because as I said, they are just people, and no one likes to to be forced into a corner. Of course, I do not always exibit the ability to follow my own advise. It is sound advise, but not easy to master... __________________ Karl Ian Sagal To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 5 or greater. You currently have 0 posts. "Well done is better than well said." (Ben Franklin) Bene factum melior bene dictum Proud past President of SEG America and member of the First Premier Segway Enthusiasts Group and subsequent ones as well.

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